sigh. today. i stayed back in school till about 7.45? to finish up bioprocess essay. adeline went off at about 6pm, so i stayed on in school with him.

today just got me thinking. like got me really thinking. its as if, things were yet different again. im not sure why either. it just seems as if it wasnt the same. how do i define the same then? well, im unsure of it myself. this entry is more like a reflection on my part. like what the hell im doing.

staying on and doing work was yeah, isnt that what normal friends do. really, im trying to convince myself that im putting way too much on the line, its like im trying too hard at times to get his attention, its just soo not me. and i just dont get myself.

on the way home, i don know, maybe both of us were equally worn out, so maybe there were lesser things to say. yups, so we barely say anything much. it was unlike de previous trip home. maybe, just maybe, he's trying to hint that i shudnt get my hopes too high.. i dunno.. i feel as if he's aware. me staying back with him, i've never done that before, so why the sudden urge to keep staying back? or maybe im just thinkin too much.. or issit my actions in class seem to obvious? haiss.

i dont know. i dont know. i dont know. love hormones wearing out? perhaps [[[clarification here, i only said love hormones cos i thot thats the term ms used, oh well, definitely not love. i guess love is much more complicated than this.. wokays, changed to like hormones]]].

mayb just cos, we're so different. worlds apart? but we do share loads in common as well.. sigh.. it also feels as if 'someone' could kick me out of the race anytime.

oh well, im thinking wayyy too much. wayyy too much.