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Friday, January 23, 2009 @ 11:44 PM heys merv, i dont think u will ever see this.
but so long as my intentions are there. happy 20th burfdae u, my giant protector. and someone whom i find very cool, and enjoyed every moment of ur company. enjoy ur burfdae merv. im sorry if tdy was meant to be a happy day, but i didnt seem to be tt all happy.. trust me, a thousand thots ran across my head, amidst those smiles, laughters, and camwhoring. and den when i reached a point, whereby i just cudnt take it. i just had to go ahead first. im sorry for those who was muddled by why i reacted tt way, leaving without sayin gdbye, & im sorry to merv, or anson, if dey did saw me in de train, but i chose to look away. & im sorry for not replyin to ur sms, or pickin up ur call.. & im sorry if i've did anythin, to make dis day a less enjoyable one. im just exhausted tts all. i dont wanna be like this anymore. its really mentally draining for me. prolly by now, everyone thinks im a crybaby, cos im practically, a psychotically emotional loser. but im not like this. i know im not. i feel so fucking useless for not being able to handle everythin on my own anymore. when was i such a weakling? i was just so so mentally tired, i just cried on de mrt, n on de bus without caring bout how others looked at me, n i even broke dwn in front of dad.. argh, baring evrything out in this blog. was it a right move from the start? i doubt so. but i've done that anyways. i will keep this blog alive. although its really futile. but i will no longer update it as much. im gonna go to sleep, hoping all my problems wud be gone along with the winds.. if not in reality, at least in my dreams. |
colourful 12 June 1989 19 goin 20. yeps. dark, short, ugly but considered adorable.hahas. psychotic. in a nice way:D Click here if you want to leave. loves all my lovable peeps. dark chocs. walking aimlessly (at times) reflecting. HAHAS. being my psychotic self. CIP sessions. muahahas. my 2 chubby chubs bunnies. gossips :D ESCAPADES class hugs sally loves mellarla merv de lovin giant azhar into the past July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 APPLAUSE basecodes by: detonatedlove/♥s} images: photobucket designer: /♥s}summerkisses} |